Mom’s Thoughts on Online Dating

     This is not a typical Mother’s Day post. But, it does have to do with my Mom’s deep love and concern. I love her dearly for her advice and for wanting the very best for me. And sometimes, I find humor in our daily exchanges. Yes, I talk to my mother (and father) every day. Despite the 600 miles that physically separate us, we are a close-knit family. And I would not want it any other way. (The close-knit part, not the distance part!)
     The mere thought of me plunging into online dating has sent my mother into a bit of a tizzy. But for those of us over 40, let’s face it, we do not have many other alternatives.

     “I don’t like the idea of you doing this online dating thing.”
     I sigh heavily. “Uh huh.”
     “Did you see Criminal Minds this week?”
     “Yes.”
     “You saw what happened to those girls?”
     “Yes.”
     “I’d feel better if one of your friends set you up with someone.”
     “You know they tried. But the guys were all old.”
     “Age shouldn’t matter.”
     “In theory, I agree. But I’m not attracted to old men.”
     “They all weren’t that old.”
     “They were closer to your age than to mine. That doesn’t work for me.”
     “How will you know if these online men are who they say they are?”
     “I don’t. But that could happen no matter how I meet a guy.”
     “Don’t ever meet a man at his house.”
     “I know. I’m not stupid. I would meet him at a restaurant or some public place.”
     “One with good lighting in the parking lot.”
     Rolling my eyes, I reply, “Yes, one with good lighting.”
     “So how does this work exactly?”
     “Everyone fills out a profile with interests and stuff. Then some computer program matches us up based on our profiles.”
     “But they could lie and use someone else’s picture.”
     “Yes, they could. But that would be pretty stupid. And I wouldn’t sign up for a free site. I’d use one you have to pay for. That should weed out some of the riff-raff.”
     “I love you, and I just want you to be happy.”
     “I know. I love you too.”
     “Let’s change the subject.”
     “Okay. Thank you.” I am relieved.
     “So, did you see the segment on the news about The Villages?”
     (The Villages is a popular retirement community in Florida.)
     “No, I didn’t.”
     “Well, there has been a drastic rise in STDs among the residents. Since the women can’t get pregnant, they’re not practicing safe sex. The men are spreading venereal diseases around like wildfire.”

     And that’s my mom – master of subtlety!

Copyright © 2013 by Suzanne Purewal

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16 thoughts on “Mom’s Thoughts on Online Dating

  1. We should all have someone like your mom looking out for us! I briefly tried the online dating experience, and definitely think good parking lot lighting is an important first-date consideration. 🙂

  2. It’s interesting that your Mom thinks it is only the men responsible for the spread of STDs. It takes two for the transfer.
    As an “old man” it is nice to know there are mature women who still like to have fun. 😉

  3. Your mom is truly concerned for your well being and I don’t blame her, this world is not always kind…..

  4. Definitely sounded like Mom reasoning – not all bad, though! I will be keeping my eyes open for any suitable men.

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